DEVELOPING FRIENDSHIPS

"A friend loves at all times." Proverbs 17:17

Dr. John Maxwell writes: "If you want deep lasting friendship, you cannot always be the strong one.  And that can be frightening; especially if you have had someone hurt or manipulate you.  But you must let a friend see you in your weakness.  Some of us have never done this, and we wonder why we are lonely.  We are going to have to get vulnerable to have a true friend.

"Friends serve each other.  When was the last time you performed an act of servant-hood for a friend to whom you are devoted?  If you cannot remember, you are probably living with a core of loneliness.  A friend is someone you commit to not because of what they can do for you, but just because they are your friend.  And friends listen, even though they are busy.  Listening is an act of love.  It says, "I am going to put my own agenda on hold and devote myself to knowing and caring for you."  Friends are not generally looking for someone who can talk very impressively or cleverly or with great wit.  Mostly what they are looking for is a world-class listener.  Furthermore, when something goes right, friends celebrate.  Do you do that?  When was the last time one of your friends had God bless them - and you threw a party?

"If you are not in this kind of friendship right now, you cannot make it happen, but you can open yourself up to it.  You can start pursuing it.  You can ask God to guide you.  You can take little relational risks.  And if you already have friends like this, prize them, protect them, enrich them in every way, and take that friendship as deep as you can."