Tuesday, February 7, 2012

MANIPULATIVE RELATIONSHIPS

"Fear of man is a dangerous trap."  Proverbs 29:25

When you enter any relationship, romantic, social, business or otherwise, be careful what you permit in the beginning because it will come to be expected.  For example, if you have to buy someone's friendship by letting them manipulate you, be prepared to keep paying.  And do not plan on changing them.  Just think how difficult it is to change yourself - so what are your chances of changing somebody else?  Decide now what you can live with later.  And stop living like there is no tomorrow - because tomorrow always comes!  Solomon said, "Fear of man is a dangerous trap."  Relationships cannot thrive with one person calling all the shots while the other struggles for approval.

Paul said he had no interest in "trying to make people accept him".  His only interest was pleasing God.  (See Galatians 1:10).  God will never ask you to violate your values or disobey His will to be in the good graces of another person.  In fact, it is better to be alone than to allow anyone other than God to control you.  Let people know upfront that while you would like their approval you can live without it if you have to.  Respect others, and make it clear you expect the same in return.

Above all, never let emotion win out over wisdom, or drown out the voice of God in your life.  When you are insecure you can be drawn into wrong relationships.  Security is a fundamental part of your identity as God's child.  Paul says you "are God's masterpiece...created...anew in Christ" (Ephesians 2:10).  God wants you free to be who you are.  That is why when you ask Him to guide your relationships, He will help you to form the right ones.

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